In the space of 2 days I’ve watched the movie ‘The Other Woman’ which was totally a hit, and I’ve also participated in a marriage event. How do the two come together you wonder? Well I wouldn’t usually dream of entertaining this topic however quite recently I finished a conversation with a young man who hit the subject home.
At the marriage events I myself was taken back by how many beautiful sisters were, divorced with children, at the event. Their beauty of character and appearance seemed to shine amongst others who were clearly very young but ready for marriage. I sat at my table and continued to see a rotation of brothers grace me and a few other sisters with their presence.
At the end of the event I mingled with the sisters and asked a few whether they would consider being second wives as clearly a lot of the brothers at these events were either too young or first timer’s in the quest for love and were not interested in marrying divorced women. Their response was clear as I was met with a choir of, No’s.
I then contemplated on how many women who were happily married would be prepared to encourage their husbands to marry again. In addition to this my conversation that I embarked upon with a young man was in the following context. I had mentioned how astounded our beloved Prophet Muhammed SAW really was as not only did he Marry for the FIRST TIME to a DIVORCED WOMAN, but Khadijah RA was 15 years older than him. The brother defended his position by stating that there is much difficulty in attaining this level of character, not only for men but also for women, he stated the example of presenting the divorced woman with the opportunity of being a second wife. The Point is it seems, everybody struggles with the concept of sharing or been ‘SECONDS’.
Thinking back to the movie ‘The Other Woman’, I reminised on how many times I’d spoken to girls who where either fully aware that they were ‘The Other Woman’, or played dumb almost holding onto some dignity of claiming ‘The wifey’ award when everybody knew she was one of many.
Islam of course gives the green light to this practice, and whilst many find difficulty in swallowing this pill, I wonder how long it will be before this foreign practice becomes very familiar indeed.